Boston’s lap dance letdown lands team wrong publicity, but will it help ticket sales? plus the links

The Blazers pictured either pre-game or waiting for Scorch to finish up at centre-floor. (Photo: Larry Palumbo)
The Blazers pictured either pre-game or waiting for Scorch to finish up at centre-floor. (Photo: Larry Palumbo)

It appears that Colin Doyle was wrong.

Last month while the Toronto Rock went the too obvious, non-erotic route when Doyle gained the franchise some good national exposure while appearing on TSN’s Off the Record, the Rock captain was asked about the recent pre-season brawl with the Buffalo Bandits, Doyle saying, “The great thing about lacrosse brawls is that it’s the only time we get the mainstream media. So every two years or so there has to be one of these to keep us relevant.”

Doyle obviously would never get hired by the Boston Blazers to do any kind of marketing, because the team found a  major loophole in Doyle’s international lax exposure theory.

Lap dances.

Not only lap dances, but lap dances performed on a team mascot whose flaming red hair is already standing on end even before any straddling and gyrating occurs.

Unless you’ve been living under a rock which itself was trapped under an avalanche of even bigger, impossible to inch boulders since Saturday night (and survived), you’ve already heard that the Blazers actually ”pulled off” the above, a halftime lap dance contest in front of an arena “filled” with families complete with well underage youngsters.

Their mascot, Scorch, was positioned in the middle of the floor while a trio of young ladies danced, grooved and enticed to his pleasure.

But how would one be able to know if a seated Scorch, seemingly a million miles away from the glassed out crowd, enjoyed the moves featured in front of his nether regions? The Blazers thankfully already thought that one out while spitballing this gem. When asked if he liked what he saw, the team played a springing “boing” noise across the public address system. Even if you were stationed in front of a urinal during the break, you knew Scorch was a pretty happy camper.

Anyways, this marketing mess has gone extremely viral in just a little over 24 hours, already appearing on Deadspin (with the title, “Nothing Says Professional Lacrosse Like A Mascot Getting Several Lap Dances”), the New York Daily News, Fox Sports, and in their own backyard (“La-crossing the line” – Boston Globe).

After Boston’s Facebook page was swarmed with angry, unimpressed and in some cases sickened ticket holders, B’s President and GM Doug Reffue posted (under the name Boston Blazers Scorch, whose Facebook relationship status reads, “It’s complicated”, no kidding) the following statement in response to the incensed online mob:

The Boston Blazers half time act for Saturday’s game was clearly not executed according to plan. We are extremely disappointed with elements of the halftime show.

We had intended to provide an entertaining and fun halftime environment for our fans and that is not what transpired. The Boston Blazers organization values our fans and have taken their feedback very seriously.

We have already taken steps to ensure this never happens again at one of our games. Over the past three seasons the Blazers have worked to bring our fans a terrific sports and entertainment value.

We are committed to our community involvement in Boston and dedicated to our fans. We will re-double our efforts to ensure a great experience at all future Blazers games.

And then on Monday morning, to ensure the team’s dance team, The Sparks, were in no way connected, Reffue continued:

From Doug Reffue, Blazers President & GM: The Sparks dance team members were not in any way involved with the planning or execution of the halftime act from last Saturday night’s game nor are they involved in planning or developing any of the Blazers promotions. The Boston Blazers are grateful for the professionalism and dedication of our Sparks dance team.

And no mention in many if any of the reports that have gotten the franchise more mainstream press than signing Casey Powell or Josh Sanderson over the off-season, or oddly firing Head Coach Tom Ryan just weeks before their season opener, or likely even “the hit”; the Blazers are 2-0 courtesy of an impressive 10-7 win over the Edmonton Rush in Week 2, when a pretty good lacrosse game played second fiddle to a very bad decision.

But…

Although considered distasteful by many in attendance, what will ticket sales look like for Boston's next home game (Jan. 22) thanks to the lap dance press?

  • It will rise. The attendance, not Scorch. (37%, 183 Votes)
  • Decline (36%, 178 Votes)
  • Stay about the same. (27%, 137 Votes)

Total Voters: 497

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Check out Fox’s report below…

PLUS THE LINKS

Calgary Head Coach Dave Pym has been extremely happy with the team’s defensive game, not so much the consistency of their offense however, telling the Calgary Sun, “You could tell before the game. It was an energy thing. We were still resilient, and our defence was phenomenal. We are playing the defence better than ever, even when we won the championship. There will be long chats this week about the offensive lineup, and we will decide if this is the week to send the message. It could be depending on what my mood is when I watch the game.” (Calgary Sun)… After demanding his players stay in shape, Edmonton Rush Head Coach Derek Keenan thought he should be a better example, telling the Toronto Sun, “So yeah, I thought, I’m preaching it to these guys all the time – offseason, during the season – and I wasn’t necessarily in the best shape.” Keenan has dropped upwards of 30lbs since Canadian Thanksgiving. (Toronto Sun)… The Minnesota Swarm hooked up with the Minnesota Indian Affairs Council this past summer, creating a Lax-4-Life camp, which teaches Native youth about the sport and how it’s viewed and played today. “These kids were amazing. In all of the camps I’ve ever done, especially with beginners, these kids picked up the sport the fastest.” – Aime Caines (Pioneer Press)

The foremost boxla writer, Tutka is a former NLL scout and a longtime Inside Lacrosse contributor. Email him at paul.tutka@nllinsider.com.

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